Before we get into discussing all the signs you are a pathological liar, it is important to note that everyone lies in one form or another. Little white lies are often told to spare the feelings of others or to try and get what it is you really want. We even discussed previously how to tell if someone is lying to you. However, when those lies go from tiny to life-changing, then you cross a very dangerous line.
Most people learn early on that lying is not healthy because if you lie once, you have to continue to live the lie and keep up the illusion, and it becomes more work that it is worth. When you lie because you stop having morals, you don’t care about hurting someone, or you are trying to deceive, you join the ranks of the pathological liar.
Here are six signs you are a pathological liar.
1. The Lies Become More Frequent
When you begin lying about everything, you are no longer trying to spare someone’s feelings, you are a pathological liar now. No matter the situation, you find a way to stretch the truth and manipulate people. Some pathological liars will make up stories at work to make themselves look better and the rest of the employees incompetent. In friendly circles, you lie to make others like you and for friends to hate other friends. If you have the chance to make yourself look better at the expense of another, then you will simply stretch the truth without reservation.
2. The Constant Search for Attention
The pathological liar is always looking for attention. Whether you are in a group of three or a room full of people, you have to be in every conversation. You tell stories that make you look better, you will create stories and gossip about others, you will say anything to keep the spotlight on you. The pathological liar is going to bend the truth any chance they can get in order to impress another person. If you do not notice them, they will fish for complements or lie to shock you into paying them attention.
3. The Body Language of a Liar
The pathological liar will give away tells in their body that make it impossible to deny they are in fact telling tall-tales. When you are telling lies, you can not look the other person directly in the eyes because you think you will give away fact you are not being truthful. Once the lair has developed into pathological status, they tend to cross their arms in defiance or turn away from you as they are telling their stories. These liars have one weakness, being able to look another directly in the eyes and tell a sincere story.
4. The Ever Changing Story
The one thing about a pathological liar is that they can not keep their own stories straight. The fact is they are telling their stories to so many different people, and they have to embellish upon the story every time they speak. This creates a problem for the pathological liar because as the stories get more involved, they have to keep adding new twists and turns, and before they know it, they forgot how the story started. Ask a friend about this story and they will tell you a completely different version than the one you heard from the source. These lairs are great storytellers with terrible memories.
5. The Issue with Self-Esteem
The pathological definitely has self-esteem issues, so they create these incredible stories to give their ego a boost. Today they lie about an injury, tomorrow it gets more elaborate, and by the end of the week you think they have fought off a gang of bikers on their own. If the lies get them attention and cast them in a good light, they have little trouble pushing the envelope because the prize is worth the risk.
6. Inability to Confront the Truth
Perhaps the most telling of all signs you are a pathological liar, your inability to confront the truth. When you are busted in a lie, and two parties confront you, the bottom line is you go to great lengths to avoid having to explain yourself. This means you would rather start a fight with both parties than come clean, pitting one against the other if necessary. Even when the pathological liar is 100% wrong, they will push the blame to another.